You’re doing it wrong

Ok. Because I AM A WRITER … and I want to talk about writing and writing related things that are really writing related things not just crap that stirs the pot but doesn’t help writing advance….

I spent this last Saturday in a workshop and in that work shop I heard the presenter say that we need to STOP using words that sexualize skin tone.. She said that using words like mocha, chocolate, coffee make your writing unacceptable and degrading. She said no one does that to other other skin tones (white) unless they are intentionally being degrading?
Now I have thought about this for almost a week and I am not sure I agree… I happen to know that I have read the words “creamy” “milky” “cherry” “peachy” in many popular and good books I know I have used them. So …

Is it wrong? Do we have some “responsibility” to not equate skin tone with things we find enjoyable? And does that extend to hair color, eye color, lips color??? Is it something we need to stop doing? Is it our genre? is it an actual problem we just haven’t heard about that readers might be throwing books across the room over? Or is it just the way people are made to relate to our vision of our characters? I for one do not use a great many physical descriptive words because I don’t want to force my take on what is beauty or sexy I want the ready to imprint that themselves… But I say her hair was like wheat …